No matter how hard you work, poop happens

time_out copyPeople discipline other peoples’ children all the time.

I’ve done it. It was called for. When the neighbor kids were climbing on their garage I told them to get down. They were first or second graders, or something, who couldn’t possibly be doing anything productive on top of a garage.

When they sassed me in response, I assured them yes, I was the boss of them, by virtue of the fact that every sober parent on the planet would agree with me, as would any emergency room physician.

And then I repeated, rather emphatically, that they were to climb the hell down from the garage roof right now or things were going to get serious.

I’m a parent now, and realize everyone knows get serious really means: I am going to keep hurling empty threats at you until you get tired of listening to me and give me WHAT I WANT.

Fortunately these kids didn’t wait to find out what get serious meant. They climbed down.

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Seriously, there was never a ‘Timmy’…

And I did not write this note
… and I did not write this note

A few years ago, I wrote an article about the merits of the Love and Logic™ parenting model. It seemed like such a tidy method: give kids a few rules to live by, be consistent in upholding those rules, and then be empathetic without saving their bacon when they  suffer the consequences of not following the rules.

For instance, instead of screeching for your eleven year-old to wear a coat to school, let him know it’s currently only five degrees warmer than the temperature at which he was crying like a baby on the ski slope just last winter. Tell him where the coat can be found, what time you’re leaving, and let him make his own choices. Then shove him in the car when it’s time for school even though he’s still in pajamas.

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