Matthew Broderick might disagree

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Vikings get fussy without their screen time.

My kid has been telling me for about a week about some study that shows video games might not be bad for you.

“Did Mario Brothers commission it?” Mike asks, but Jack can’t remember his source. I’m thinking it’s probably something he heard from school or else he’d be dragging us over to the computer screen to read whatever it is right now.

I humor him and Google: video games may not be bad for you and up pop a few articles. None of the sources is BuzzFeed; a check in the plus category for the efficacy of the study from an online research perspective.

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Reason #7 Bajillion

xboxJack preordered a game for his Xbox some time ago and has been ticking off the days until its arrival.

Our Amazon account is actually set up to deliver to Mike’s office, which ensures someone’s always available to sign for a delivery. Depending upon your perspective, this arrangement has additional upsides.

I do love the man for many reasons. He knows my coffee drink from Starbucks, he does laundry, and he’s always willing to more pressing matters aside in order to punk our children. Following is his latest work for your happy Tuesday:

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Somebody better be thanking me from a podium one day for all this

“Mom, I think the X-Box is taking over my life.”

The remarkable thing about our teen’s tearful admission was not its frankness, nor the way it made me wonder whether it was intended to be manipulative. The remarkable thing was that it compelled me to defend the game console, to build a case for giving it another chance.

After recounting the injustices each kid had suffered at the hands of the other, both were in tears. They were now mostly upset because I had threatened to throw away the object in question, which I really didn’t want to do. The object in question was pricey.

We’ve foisted screen addiction on them. We’ve plugged our kids into a matrix of daily thought control, where the influencers range from fast food commercials to internet predators. Where the products are obesity, diabetes, “nature deficiency disorder,” and an obstruction of the body’s ability to produce melatonin for a decent night’s sleep.

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